Weekly wisdom: happiness cannot be pursued
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Arnold Schwarzenegger <[email protected]>
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Arnold's Pump Club promotes a healthier and happier life by sharing weekly wisdom and research on social health. They highlight the negative impact of "frenemies" on biological aging, citing a study that links difficult relationships to faster aging. The brand welcomes subscribers to their positive online community, offering daily emails and health upgrades.
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How Difficult People May Age You Faster (And The Surprising Relationship That Does the Most Damage)
Research links each difficult relationship to faster biological aging. But one type of friend may do more damage than the constant critic.
Welcome to the positive corner of the internet. We’re here to make your life healthier, happier, and less stressful. At the bottom of each email, we explain our editorial process, stance on AI, and partnership standards.
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Today’s Health Upgrade
Number you won’t forget
Don’t let your good ideas slip by
Weekly wisdom: the pursuit of happiness
Why do non-drowsy medications make you sleepy?
Social Health
Number You Won’t Forget: 9 Months
It's Not Your Enemies. It's Your Frenemies.
You already know which people in your life drain you. Maybe it’s the relative who turns every dinner into a debate, or the friend who only calls when something's wrong, or they need a favor.
If you think those people are your biggest social stressor, there’s another type of relationship causing more trouble for your health than you expect.
Research suggests that the people who get on your nerves the most are not necessarily the ones who cause your DNA to age the most.
Researchers mapped people's close social networks and flagged the members who make life harder (they called them "hasslers."). Then they measured biological aging using DNA methylation "clocks" that read chemical marks on DNA from a saliva sample to estimate how old the body is and how fast it is aging.
Each difficult tie was associated with roughly nine months of extra biological age and about a 1.5% faster pace of aging.
The people who are supportive sometimes and stressful at other times appear to be more stressful than those who are just consistently negative.
The researchers believe it’s because your body can brace for a known problem. But when someone is inconsistent, your stress response remains heightened, so you’re not blindsided.
But let’s make sure we put this into context: biological clocks are flawed and have clear limitations, so we don’t know how much relationships can shorten your life. And there are many blind spots that could taint the data. For example, people in poorer health may report more difficult relationships.
Either way, there’s a significant amount of research that suggests your social life is tied to your physical and mental health. You don’t need to keep rankings of who is doing the most damage. But it might be a good idea to be aware of your relationships, so you can protect yourself from the damaging ones.
A rule of thumb: Add more time with the consistently good, and limit it with the inconsistent friends who only show up part of the time.
Together With Wispr Flow
Forget Less, Preserve More (Of What Matters)
You walk out of a meeting with three follow-ups and great ideas for each. You go to start writing it all down, but then you get a text message. Next thing you know, you have 2 new emails, and then someone pops their head into your office to ask you a question.
By the time the distractions end, you know the items, but you can’t remember all your great ideas.
It’s not because you’re scattered or unfocused. It’s because your working memory — the stuff you can hold onto in the moment — has a limit, and you just surpassed it.
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